The following is the "Rodeo Cowboy's Prayer."
Surrounded by dozens of American flags on the rodeo grounds, rodeo people will often utter this selfish and self-righteous offering just before they begin violating rodeo rules, the humane laws of whatever state they happen to be in, and knocking the hell out of God's creatures. This prayer from animal abusers is the height of profane hypocrisy and blasphemy.
Those committing criminal acts do so in front of rodeo judges and contestants, and not a single individual has enough backbone or common decency, much less the spirit of the Lord, to stand up and say “Enough!"
SHARK's analysis of the Cowboy Prayer are in green.
Our Heavenly Father,
We have paused in the midst of this Rodeo, mindful of you and all the blessings you've bestowed upon us.
Lordy yes! Where else could we get a deal like this? We get to wrap ourselves in the American flag, kick the living hell out of your creatures and still pretend to be fine Christians at cowboy church. Don't that beat all?
You see, Lord, there is no need for you to bless us with compassion for your creatures.
We pray Lord that you be with each of us and especially with the contestants in this arena as we pray that you will guide us in life's arena.
Guide us to ever more tame domesticated victims that we can taunt, maim, injure and kill in our fantasy of being little "John Waynes."
We don't ask you for any special favors Lord.
But of course, if you would let us get away with just a little more cruelty and corruption we'd be much obliged.
We don't ask that you always make it rain when we need it, nor do we ask that you always let the sun shine.
No sir. We just ask that you keep public officials corrupt enough to hand over tax dollars and have a blind eye to criminal abuse and let us get away with whatever we want.
Can anyone spell H-Y-P-O-C-R-I-S-Y?
We don't always ask for the calf that runs straight, nor do we shun the one that won't lay.
Nah, we'll just kick the crap out of them to make 'em run like hell the next time.
We don't ask to draw round the chute fighting horse nor condemn the ride not bringing pay.
Nope. No need to condemn them because we can spike them, shock them, twist and rake their tails, and choke and drag them. We figure that if we nail 'em a few dozen times before they go out again, they'll buck just fine!
We just pray Lord that you help us, so we may live our lives in such a manner, that when it comes time to make that last ride to the country up there, where the water runs, cool, clear and deep and where the grass grows stirrup high, lush and green, that you will tell us, as our last Judge, that our entry fees are paid.
Oh yea, oh yea. Nothin' but rodeo up there in the heavens. Endless supplies of calves and steers and horses and bulls to harass and mutilate and shock and spur and spike. Glory be on high!
Amen.
These characters are reminiscent to the Pharisees of ancient Israel, who would very publicly beat their chests and raise their arms and voices to the heavens to loudly and sanctimoniously proclaim their dedication to God. According to the Bible, God saw the phonies for what those Pharisees were then, and we have little doubt the he sees through today’s Pharisees (rodeo thugs) just as easily.
